All posts in "I Don’t Even Know"

Hammer Anvil Tongs

Published April 26, 2018 in I Don't Even Know , Portraits - 0 Comments

Hammer Anvil Tongs

It’s a kaleidoscope hand, talented but flawed.

Belonging to he that was cast out

for being ugly.

Capable of making beautiful things,

in the fires of the forge.

Hated his parents for abandoning him.

On mother’s celebration day,

he gifted her a throne that he had made with this hand.

It was a trap that imprisoned her.

The price of her freedom?

Give him the most beautiful of goddesses as a bride.

He got his wish, but she would honor him.

Cheated on him with the handsome god of war.

Another indignity. Still, they were a family.

Four daughters in all:

One was a goddess of good reputation and glory.

Another a goddess of plenty and prosperous.

A third, a goddess of eloquence.

The youngest, a goddess of friendliness.

All beautiful like their mother.

He loved them, like any artist loves his children.

Undo Your Safety Belt

Published April 19, 2018 in I Don't Even Know - 0 Comments

Undo Your Safety Belt

It won’t be a bumpy ride.

We got this.

“Get the commissioner on the phone.

Put him on with me when you have him.”

“Hello, Commissioner? Yeah, listen,

I was asked to give you a call, but not give you a call.

So that you would never be put in a predicament

where somebody said that you were called.”

“Who is this?”

“Doesn’t matter who it is. What matters is that

you were given a call, but not given a call.”

“Are you threatening me?”

“Enjoy the rest of your afternoon, Commissioner.”

Click.

He looked at his phone, incredulous.

Chips and Bitters

Published November 24, 2017 in I Don't Even Know , LA Stories , Max - 0 Comments

Chips and Bitters

I liken you to a janitor

The way you mopped

The floor with me.

Closed the door on me,

All the while

Saying you adored on me.

And I liken you to a cold syringe 

The way you needled me

Injected me

Infected me with a virus

That protected me

Until you rejected me

All the while

Peeking through 

The peephole 

Smiling on the other side

Of the door.

Hows Them Apples

Published August 28, 2017 in Arizona Stories , I Don't Even Know - 0 Comments

Hows Them Apples

Here’s a window into my heart.

I’ve reached a place where I don’t need love.

And it’s not at all out of bitterness.

I don’t long for, anymore.

I don’t pine for rapture.

Nor is it out of a sense of defeat.

And there is no malice.

I’m mostly happy and free to just be.

Incisor Man

Published August 16, 2017 in I Don't Even Know , LA Stories - 0 Comments

Incisor Man

My teeth are self-whitening.

It’s the craziest freakin’ thing.

I mean, I could rub furniture stain on them

and they’d be pearly white in the morning.

I don’t know how it happened.

I used that light thingy once.

Now, I’m all animal instinct.

I just want to bite you.

Applying to become a super hero.

My Sheperd

My Shepaerd

God is the master of random.

He plays it like a cheap suit chess player.

And he is the ultimate in thinking many moves ahead.

God thinks, like, a million moves ahead.

In fact, he’s already thought of the move

that will bring us back to the beginning.

And, he’s already made it.

Your move.

Off Kilter

Published July 30, 2017 in I Don't Even Know , LA Stories - 0 Comments

Off Kilter2

After only being here for a short time,

I’m not exactly sure if I’ve been here before.

Some things are familiar.

Like the cricket’s song.

But, it sounds like they’re signing in another language.

And everyone’s pointing pistols,

like they need them to speak.

Then I woke up and

realized I was in a movie.

Icarus

Published July 14, 2017 in I Don't Even Know - 0 Comments

Icarus

Flew too high, fell too hard.

Got wax all over everything.

Punished for getting too close,
guilty for being too bold.

Ruined it for everyone.

Of course, his father was really to blame.

Being all crafty and inventive,
locking up the big bull headed stud.

Labyrinth makers can’t be trusted,
they always kiss and tell.

Assemblage by Maklin Ryan

Chicken Little

Chicken Little

Why did the chicken cross the Möbius strip?

To get to the other side.

Same reason he crossed the road.

There’s only so many ways you can answer the important questions.

Another equally important question is:

How much smack could a woodchuck talk if a woodchuck could talk smack?

I mean, inquiring minds must know.

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There’s a much dirtier version of this story. Bit I spared you because you don’t need your minds filled with more filth. 😉

The Doctor’s Lament

Published June 11, 2017 in I Don't Even Know , LA Stories - 0 Comments

The Doctors Lament

I was blind for a time in my left eye.

From a virus and not wanting to see.

Wore an eye patch and I still saw patients.

Eye doctor said the retina had detached.

Didn’t understand how it had healed again.

I said “luck” and didn’t tell him about the herbs or the forgiveness.